Sep 062011

Tonight was my first weigh-in with my trainer. Of course my biggest fear is always that I’ve gained weight, or didn’t lose any at all. I was pleased to see that I’ve lost this week.

Starting Weight: 237.2 lbs
Current Weight: 234.2 lbs
Difference: -3.0 lbs

My trainer also measures inches from different body parts. I lost .5 of an inch from my neck, 1 inch from my bicep. .5 of an inch from my forearm, 2.5 inches from my chest, 3.5 inches from my waist, 3 inches from my lower waist, and 2 inches from my thigh. That’s a grand total of 13 inches!

As for my diet, I need to cut some of the grains. That food group is definitely my weakness. I’m going to try eating something other than cereal for breakfast, and to limit eating crackers as a snack if I’m having a grain for dinner.

The running is going better than I ever thought it would. I’m not sure how much I ran my first day. My second run was on Saturday, and it was very hot and humid. I wasn’t able to run much because I couldn’t take a deep breath. I tried using my inhaler but that didn’t really help – it was just the weather. My third run was Monday, and it was cool and rainy. I was able to run close to a mile (in 1/8 mile increments – walk 1/8, run 1/8), and walked at least another mile. Another one of my goals for next week is to work on my breathing when I’m running, and to set a good rhythm and pace for myself. I need to learn to not immediately panic if I can’t take a nice deep breath, because then I start breathing faster, which brings on hyperventilating and asthma attacks.

So, that’s my first week wrap-up. I hope I can continue to lose for the next weigh-in.

Sep 022011

I completely skipped last week’s post, but in my defense, I was so busy preparing for the first week back at work that it completely slipped my mind.

One of the most interesting things has come about because of me being back at work, however. I’ve found a personal trainer. A very reasonably priced, very helpful, very passionate personal trainer. I’ve considered using a personal trainer before. Most of the trainers I could find were through the local YMCAs and not only was it expensive (most often $75 per half-hour session), but in order to get those expensive rates, you also had to pay for a YMCA membership. At the time, it was too much and out of the question. So, back to the story. A couple of my co-workers lost weight over the summer, and upon inquiring, I found out that another co-worker is also a licensed personal trainer. I was immediately interested, but figured the cost would be too much. I was wrong, it’s an awesome deal, and her goal is not to make money, but to help people get (and stay) in shape.

Tuesday night was my initial consult and weigh-in. I weighed in at 237 lbs (my scale said 234, but as of right now, I’m more inclined to believe hers is closer to actuality). I have all of my measurements written down, and I’ll weigh in and get measured every Tuesday. Because of this, my progress reports will probably change to Tuesday or Wednesday.

I knew this was something I wanted to do, and because the opportunity was there, I decided to go for it. The biggest part of the exercise portion is learning how to run correctly. I knew there was running involved, and I was terrified that I’d make a complete ass of myself (or worse, have an asthma attack, faint, or vomit…or some combination of those three). I got my schedule, and I was scheduled for my first run on Wednesday.

Wednesday after work, I started to get nervous. Running is one thing I have always loathed. Probably because in high school, I was always the last person (by a long shot) during the timed mile run in gym class. I was made fun of because of it. But I had no choice at this point, and I made myself go – water bottle in hand and inhaler in my pocket. And believe it or not, I made it the whole 45 minute session (not running the entire time, but brisk walking when I wasn’t running) without an asthma attack, fainting, or vomiting. I felt a little sore yesterday, and still a little sore today, so I know my next run (tomorrow morning) will probably be tough. But if I can make it through the first two weeks, I think I’ll be alright.

Now, the other portion is tracking what you eat, staying within certain calorie range, and staying away from certain ingredients. I’ve been trying to eat better for some time now, and I figured I’d be okay on that end. What I wasn’t prepared to find out was that I’ve been way UNDER the amount of calories I should have in a day. I added a few things to my meals today to try to increase my caloric intake in a healthy way, so I’m hoping it pays off. That could be one of the reasons why I’ve been struggling. So, I guess I’ll try to update tomorrow about how I did today and how my second run goes. I didn’t intend for this site to be solely about my weight loss, but it’s probably the most interesting thing going in on my life at the moment, so why not?

Aug 192011

I know Melissa is posting about her weight loss, so for some sense of accountability I decided to post on my weight loss.

I’m embarrassed by my weight, so I feel somewhat of a need to preface this entry with a statement. Weight loss is something that I’ve always struggled with. I’ve always had a complex about being too fat – even when I was 120 lbs in high school. I think my body image will always be skewed. That being said, I have PCOS. One of the symptoms is weight gain/trouble losing weight. I’m kind of stuck in a loop, because if I could lose the weight, some of the symptoms might ease up. But losing the weight is so damned hard. If I am not (for lack of a better word) obsessed with what I eat, I will not lose weight, and if I’m not careful, I will gain weight.

Now, about my weight gain. I had already gained weight prior to my junior year of college. Between my junior and senior years in college, I decided to use Slim Fast. I lost a good 30 lbs. Of course, once college started back up again, I stopped the diet. Around the same time, I started dating Jack. I love Jack and his family dearly, but they cook very heavy, rich (carb-laden) foods for almost every meal. Between the heavy foods, being back at college (and not liking much of the food), and the PCOS, I managed to gain that 30 lbs back, plus some. So to sum it up, between crash dieting, not watching carefully, and PCOS (which I didn’t know about at the time), I gained a lot of weight.

I won’t be posting pictures of my weight loss. At least not yet. To me, the numbers are embarrassing enough. Maybe after the fact I’ll be able to look back and get past my body image issues, but right now I just can’t. My ultimate goal is to lose about 100 lbs, but I’d take about 70 lbs, which would put me at about 170 lbs (what I weighed when I met Jack).

So, here goes.

Starting weight: 241 lbs
Current weight: 233.2 lbs
Goal weight: 140 lbs

I also set mini goals for myself, and my first mini goal is to reach 220 lbs. The 7.8 lbs I’ve lost so far is due to diet change and drinking more water. I had been down closer to 231 lbs, but apparently carbs are my enemy and cause drastic weight gain for me. I’m not eliminating carbs completely, but I’m being very selective about how many carbs I eat. I’m also following Weight Watchers. I’ve found some awesome healthy recipes.

My goals for this coming week: Work starts up again for me this week. We’ve bought an exercise bike, now I need to use it. I want to start exercising in the mornings before I go to work. I also want to up my water intake – I’ve been slacking on that the last few weeks.

Aug 162011

Summer break is over. Almost. I have a training later this week, and I need to get my classroom set up. I have trainings almost every day next week, and then the week after, school starts. Wow, time really does fly.

I promised myself I would get more done this summer than last summer, but of course that didn’t happen. That might not be true now that I think about it. Last summer I hardly did anything at all around the house and I think this summer was better (if only slightly). One thing I vow not to do next summer is let my sleep schedule get messed up. It only takes one late night for me and then my sleep schedule is messed up for the rest of the summer.

In some ways, I hope the school year goes fast. Mostly because we’re planning a trip to Florida for next summer. I really hate to wish time away but I’m excited to go to Disney and actually get to spend time at the park. The only other time I went to Disney, I went with my high school’s marching band, and while I had fun, we didn’t spend more than half a day at any of the parks. We didn’t really get a chance to ride anything, and we skipped out on the water parks and Animal Kingdom entirely. Although we did go to Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure. This time around, we have Disney passes for seven days and we plan to visit every park. We’re going to Islands of Adventure but I think we’re skipping out on Universal Studios. This may change, but I doubt it. It’s amazing how expensive tickets are. Needless to say, I’m excited. After all I am just a big child at heart. I’m probably going to drive my husband crazy for the next several months – not that it’s any different than any other day.

We’re also going to two music festivals in the upcoming months. In fact, most of my weekends are full up until the beginning of October. I’m hoping with all of this activity (plus work) I won’t have time to think about the fun things planned for next summer. I’m also hoping that in the down times, we’ll have the chance to work in our house – or maybe just move altogether, but that’s a different story for a different day, if it even happens.

 Posted by at 1:20 pm
Aug 082011

It’s almost time to go back to work, and I have an iPad for my classroom this year. Any app suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

 Posted by at 5:31 pm
Aug 052011

Pocket is the newest addition to our family. She was born sometime in August 2010, according to her vet records, and we adopted her in February 2011. Pocket is a short hair dilute tortie.

Pocket finds a comfy spot on the bed on her first day home.

We were not Pocket’s first family. She had been with a family, but was abused by other animals (ferrets) in the house, and eventually came to be in the care of the shelter. I also think something may have happened with a bigger cat, because while Pocket is fine with Matilda, she is very apprehensive about Delilah. We’re working with her to get her adjusted, and while is is slow, we are making progress.

Pocket doesn’t meow often, but she will not hesitate to growl or hiss when something is annoying her. I’m going to assume that there is probably a warning on her vet record. At the last vet visit, I had them trim her claws (Pocket is very fidgety when it comes to claw trimming), and I heard her growl and fight the whole way across the vet office. She also growls when playing. Pocket may have learned some traits from the ferrets of her former family – when she gets overly excited, she arches up and hops sideways, much like an excited ferret.

At the current time, Pocket weighs approximately 6 lbs. If she is truly almost a year old, I don’t think she will get much bigger. She looks tiny in comparison to the other two cats but is very healthy. Pocket prefers small spaces and tends to get scared when she has free run of the whole house. Because of this, Pocket stays in our bedroom when we aren’t home, and she is left out when we are home to supervise and help her. We have a cage set up in our living room for her (we leave the cage door open), and that seems to be her safe point. Whenever Pocket gets scared, she darts back into the cage.

I realize by this entry that it probably sounds like Pocket is not happy in our house, but that is not true. She is very happy, happiest when full attention is on her. Pocket purrs like mad when Jack and I walk into the room, and loves to be petted and scratched. Matilda and Pocket can be seen playing and chasing each other from time to time. Pocket avoids Delilah but is getting better with time.

Pocket and Delilah give each other nose kisses.

Aug 052011

Baby Matilda shoots an innocent look from the window.

Matilda is the middle “child.” She was born around April 2, 2009, and was adopted in August 2009, and is a short hair tortie. According to Matilda’s vet records, she and her littermates were found in a drain pipe. Matilda’s nicknames are Tilda, Tilt-a-Whirl, and Tilda Beast. Tilt-a-Whirl comes from how she used to endlessly chase her tail when she was a kitten, reminding me of the popular amusement park ride. Tilda Beast comes from her ability to sound like a thousand cats tearing through the house. Matilda (surprisingly) only weighs in around 8 lbs.

Tilda is the biggest lovebug of our cats, and she loves to cuddle. What she forgets is that she is no longer a tiny kitten. Matilda has always loved to sit and sleep on my shoulder. When she sleeps on my shoulder, her hind legs come over halfway down my chest, and I usually have to hold her so she doesn’t fall off. She purrs constantly when held, and she doesn’t mind being hugged. Matilda has love for sparkle balls and her Star Chaser. She will fight her sisters for treats, although it doesn’t show in her physique – Matilda never got past the long and lanky stage. Oh, and Matilda will gladly stand on her hind legs and put her front paws on your legs when you are eating in the hopes that you might find her adorable and give her table scraps. (That only happens in the instance that we are eating unseasoned meat – or bacon. She’s been known to steal bacon.)

Matilda is very passive-aggressive with Delilah. If Matilda wants the spot in which Delilah is laying, Matilda simply cleans Delilah until Delilah becomes annoyed and leaves. That doesn’t always work; sometimes Delilah will give Matilda a smack or two. Matilda doesn’t meow, she squeaks – almost constantly when she wants something.

The picture of sisterly love.

Aug 022011

I figured I’d do a post dedicated to each of the cats, since I’m starting fresh and two of the three have never been properly introduced.

First off, we have Miss Delilah.

Delilah on her first night with us.

Delilah was born on August 22, 2007, and brought home in November 2007. She’s a short hair silver tabby. Delilah’s nicknames are Lilah and Lala. Delilah is a very smart cat, sometimes so smart it’s scary. Within five minutes of bringing her home, Delilah figured out how to bust out of the makeshift crate we had set up for her AND how to bust out of the door to the room. For the record, the door was an accordion-style door, and she busted in and out of that room several times a day until we were no longer in that room. Now we have a bedroom with a normal door, but Delilah does jump up and try to bat the doorknob open, and she does repeatedly pull at the bottom of the door and try to pop it open.

Delilah LOVES her food, and at almost four years old, weighs in at around 12 lbs. We’re trying to help her lose a little weight, but she is just all-around big. Lilah also loves to play fetch with just about any toy. She has a few special talents. Delilah can open cat treat containers (and other containers such as Pringles) with the pop-off lid. We have to watch where we store anything that has that sort of lid. She can also open bags of cat treats with the Ziploc-type seal. So all cat treats are either stored WAY out of reach, or in a cupboard (she can open cupboards and drawers too). Also, we believe Delilah was weaned too early, because she attempts to knead her own belly and suck on her own nipple. We’ve made much progress in that area – she used to attempt this almost constantly as a kitten and it was very hard to stop her. As an adult cat, she attempts it maybe a few times a month, and usually stops when she hears the word “no” or is threatened with the evil spray bottle.

A few years ago, Delilah became deathly ill (another kitten of ours developed distemper and passed away) and was only given a 50/50 chance of living. She overcame her illness and is now happy and healthy. Because of being ill, Delilah will always have runny eyes.

Delilah wants me to get rid of the flashy black box.

Jul 292011

Two and a half years ago, I decided to do a list of 101 things to complete in 1001 days.  I did manage to accomplish several things on that list, but life took over.  I was without a job and depressed about that and a few other personal issues.  I didn’t accomplish many of the simple things that I should have accomplished.  Every time I opened up the window to blog, I felt like it was failure staring me in the face.  So I just didn’t blog.  I didn’t open the website.  In the last two and a half years, I think I’ve looked at my website five or six times.  Most of what had me depressed is a little too personal to put on here, but suffice it to say that no matter how good a plan looks on paper, things just don’t always go as planned.  It’s very frustrating to be a planner (I always have been, even though I usually procrastinate when it comes to following through) and have things out of your control.  Things that should work, don’t always work, often with no obvious reason.  I think what I’ve learned the most in the last two and a half years is that no matter how much I want to have control over my life and my plans, sometimes I just need to sit back and relax.

Relaxing is something that has always been hard for me.  I’m a very high-strung person.  I worry about everything.  And I do mean EVERYTHING.  I also realize that if I don’t sit back and relax, it is eventually going to take a toll on my health.  So I’m working on it.  By no means am I going to completely stop worrying about everything – that would be completely out of my nature.  However, I am going to try my best to only worry about things that I truly need to worry about.  I’m hoping that by starting fresh with my blog, I’ll write here more often.  And by writing more often, I’m hoping it will help my stress level.

My 101 in 1001 list doesn’t “expire” until September, but I’m calling it quits for now.  I’m going to come up with a new list.  This time, I want the list to be more fun.  It shouldn’t be a chore or something that I feel I have to do.  It should be something I want to do.

That being said, here are some of the things off my old list that I did accomplish.

I met someone in real life that I’ve talked to online.  In May 2010, Jack and I took a somewhat spontaneous roadtrip to Tulsa, Oklahoma for a record release party.  Jack has talked to a member of the band for a long time, and was a member of a message board with this person.  After we met, I also became a member of the message board and talked to a lot of awesome people.  Many of those people made the trip to Oklahoma for the record release.  It was truly awesome and one of the most memorable moments of my life.

I sold something on ebay.  Actually, a few things.  That goal is pretty self-explanatory and I’m not sure why it was so important to me two and a half years ago.

I watched 50 movies.  This really wasn’t hard to accomplish seeing as how I was depressed and we have Starz, Encore, HBO, and Cinemax.

We got another kitten.  Two, in fact.  We got Matilda in August 2009 and Pocket in February 2011.  Altogether, with Delilah, that makes three cats.  Our house often feels like the middle of a stampede.  We also got two cat condos/perches for our girls.

Jack and I managed to go to Ocean City, Maryland in August 2010.  I’m not really sure how we pulled that of without me working.  We have also attended a few baseball games and have gone to the zoo.  We also had the opportunity to go see Trans-Siberian Orchestra before Christmas 2010.  And Jack has introduced me to the wonderful world of drive-in movies.  We’ve been to the drive-in several times and I don’t think I really have much of a desire to go to a regular movie theatre again, unless it’s a newer theatre.

As far as purchases, this is where we really accomplished a lot.  I got a Vermont Teddy Bear, a Tatty Teddy, a Cricut, the Sims 3, and the Prima Guides for Sims 1/Sims 2.  Out of necessity, we had to get a “new” car.  In January 2010, my car died on the way to work.  It wasn’t worth fixing so we had to get a new car.  And in March 2011, we got another car.  This time it wasn’t because we had to, it was because I finally had a steady job and we were able to replace the old car before it died.  And because of my new job, we also bought a king bed in April 2011.  We also bought a like-new DSLR camera that one of Jack’s friends sold for $150.

Beyond that, I didn’t accomplish much else.  I didn’t lose weight, I haven’t been watching what I eat, and I didn’t care too much about my health.  That is changing.  I bought an exercise bike, I’m following Weight Watchers, and the difference this time is that I am determined.  I need to stop feeling sorry for myself when the only person who can change it is me.

If you’ve managed to read this far, congratulations.  I don’t think my entries will typically be this long, but it really does feel good to get all of that off my chest.

 Posted by at 12:05 am
Jul 282011

Right now, I’m working on getting this site back up and running after neglecting it for over two years.  Sometimes life just gets in the way.

 Posted by at 4:19 pm